The Procrastination That Keeps You Up at 2 AM

Hey, listen. You’re not lazy. Let’s get that the fuck out of the way right now.

Lazy people don’t lie awake at night, hearts pounding, staring at the ceiling while mentally screaming at themselves for not sending that email, not starting that proposal, not having that hard conversation.

You do. I do.

This is the special, advanced-class procrastination reserved for people who are highly competent. It’s the one that feels like a personal betrayal. You built a career on being reliable, on delivering, on being the person who gets shit done. And now you’re frozen by a single, seemingly simple task.

A few weeks ago, I wanted to record a video. Simple task. Right?

Yes. Did I do it?

No. I procrastinated for two weeks.

This was a feeling i’ve felt a thousand times. This time, I wanted to get to the bottom of it.

Because it makes no sense. If you’re anything like me, you do what you’ve always done: you try to out-logic it.

You break it down into smaller steps. You buy a new planner. You try the Pomodoro technique. And when that fails, you deploy the big gun: self-flagellation, aka self-abuse.

“What is wrong with you? You’re better than this. Just fucking DO IT.”

And it doesn’t work. It just makes you feel worse, which makes the task feel even more monumental. It’s a shitty, vicious cycle, and the only thing it efficiently produces is shame.

I used to think this was a moral failing. Some sort of crack in my discipline.

Well… bad news for me, good news for you: I was looking at it all wrong.

Procrastination isn’t the problem. It’s the alarm system.

The Real Reason You’re Paralyzed (It’s Not What You Think)

For years, I thought procrastination was about the task. It’s not. It’s about the feeling you associate with the task.

Let that sink in for a sec. You’re not avoiding the spreadsheet. You’re avoiding recording the video, or the anxiety of interpreting the numbers wrong. You’re not avoiding the difficult conversation with your employee or your partner.

You’re avoiding the gut-wrenching discomfort of potential conflict, or the guilt of having to be the "bad guy", the feeling of being seen as someone who made a shitty piece of content. You’re afraid of being rejected, not loved, not worthy.

Your brain, in its primitive wisdom, is doing a simple cost-benefit analysis: "Engage in this thing that will make me feel like crap, or... literally do anything else." It’s a rational choice 🙂 

The problem is, the "anything else" comes with a side order of self-criticism.

So the first question to ask isn’t "How do I force myself to do this?"
It’s: "What specific feeling am I trying to avoid, and why does it scare me so much?"

Is it the fear of being judged? Of looking stupid? Of the exhausting mental effort required? Of the confrontation? Name the ghost. It loses power when you shine a light on it. Then, sit with it. Don’t try to fix anything. Just be with the feeling. Welcome it like it’s your own, because it is.

If you want help seeing exactly what’s behind your resistance, take this free quiz; it shows you how far you’ve drifted from alignment.

The "Perfect First Draft" Trap That's Killing Your Momentum

When I started this newsletter, I used to sit down to write something, and I’d expect the final, polished, brilliant version to just flow out of my fingertips on the first try. I had a reputation to uphold, after all.

The result? I’d stare at a blank screen for an hour. I’d check my email, i’d open instagram to check on my 342 followers. I’d get a glass of water. I’d do anything but write. The gap between my vision of "perfect" and the reality of my first, shitty sentence was too vast to cross.

The breakthrough only came when I gave myself permission to write a "vomit draft." No one would ever see it. It could be clumsy, poorly worded, and make no sense at all. The only goal was to get the ideas out of my head and onto the screen.

Suddenly, writing wasn't a performance. It was an excavation. I could take that messy, ugly lump of clay and start shaping it. The first pass was for me. The second, third, and tenth passes were for everyone else.

This is the iterative mindset. It’s not about getting it right. It’s about getting it started. You can’t steer a parked car. You can’t edit a blank page. Your job isn't to be a genius on the first try. Your job is to be a stubborn, relentless editor of your own work.

Start.

Iterate, Iterate, Iterate.

Stop trying to build the perfect finished product. Just lay the first brick. It’s designed to be bad. Your job is fix it later.

When Procrastination is Actually Your Wisest Self Screaming to Be Heard

Sometimes, the voice in your head saying "you should do this" isn't your intuition. It's the ghost of your old boss, your dad, some article you read, or society's boring-ass checklist for a successful life.

Your procrastination, in these cases, is your soul's last-ditch effort to stage a protest.

In plain, simple terms.. sometimes, it’s just not aligned with who you are or what you actually want.

Have you ever had projects that you knew were smart, lucrative opportunities? And you just... couldn't... start. You beat yourself up for weeks. Is this happening right now? Ask yourself this question:

"If I wasn't allowed to be hard on myself, would I still be trying to do this?"

The answer will probably be a resounding no. The project is a "should" born out of obligation, not passion.

The next time you're stuck, try this. And ask: "Is this my priority? Or is this someone else's agenda I've internalized? Is there a different, better, more me way to achieve the underlying goal?"

The resistance might not be something to break through. It might be something to listen to.

The Bottom Line You Probably Won't Like

Beating procrastination isn't about finding a new, more sophisticated way to bully yourself. It’s the exact opposite. It’s about getting curious. It’s about treating the resistance not as an enemy, but as a data point.

Your brain (as usual) is trying to protect you from something. Your job is to figure out what, and then to gently, cleverly, redesign the process so it doesn't feel so threatening.

Stop trying to win a war with yourself. You’ll always lose. Start a conversation instead.

Your Actions for the Week (The Procrastination Prescription)

You read the words. Now, here are the actions. Pick one and do it this week.

1. The "Vomit Draft" Ship.
Stop waiting for perfect. Pick one thing you're overthinking (an email, a project outline, a social post, a video script). Your mission is to create the most embarrassing, shitty first version possible and send it to one person or post it somewhere today. The goal is to intentionally lower the bar so you can jump over it. Perfection is the enemy of done.

2. The "Priority" Interrogation.
Take 5 minutes. Write down the #1 thing you're procrastinating on. Now, ask yourself this one question: "If I was forbidden from being hard on myself, would I still be trying to do this?" Listen to the gut answer. If it's "Fuck no," you have your answer. It's not a priority; it's a prison. Cross it off or radically change the approach. If it's "Hell yes," then you know it's just fear, and you've already taken its power away by naming it.

3. The "Visibility" Audit.
You're hiding. We all are. Where are you playing small by choice? Make a list of 3 areas in your work or life where you're being strategically invisible to avoid judgment or rejection. Is it not posting your ideas? Not speaking up in meetings? Not pitching that client? Pick ONE and break the pattern this week. Send one email you're scared to send. Say the thing in the meeting. Dumber people with worse ideas are already winning. Your value is useless if you hide it.

The Bottom Line: Action → Feedback → Iteration → Identity. That's the entire game.

Until next time,

Benoit

PS. If you’re honest, maybe the thing you’ve been procrastinating on isn’t a task..it’s the second life you actually want to live.

If you’re done putting it off, let’s talk. Book a Private Call